sonicenvy

1. I’m thinking about adding a coda onto “but we loved with a love that was more than love”, which I’ve already published on AO3 as a complete fic, but is really just snatches of one of my greater Doctor/Rose AU worlds that have been living in my brain for the last nine years. The title is from one of my all time favorite Poe poems Annabel Lee. Annabel Lee is a poem that in this context has the same melancholy that looms over the Doctor and Rose. The speaker of Annabel Lee shares a great love (a love that was more than love / the angels not half so happy in heaven went envying her and me) and he outlives her (the wind came out of the cloud by night, chilling and killing my Annabel Lee) In canon this is one of the greatest tensions in the Doctor and Rose’s relationship; the Doctor knows with a great certainty that he will outlive her -- and he feels that the universe will punish him, punish them for his happiness. In my AU of course, the wind and the storm fail to get Rose and they live and love “with a love that the wingèd Seraphs of Heaven coveted.” I think the coda to that fic is something about:

“This is my wife, Rose,” The Doctor said, on a hundred thousand worlds across time and space, grinning widely. This time -- all of these times there was nothing but truth from his lips and happiness bubbling between them, overflowing their link.

“This is my husband, the Doctor,” Rose said, on a hundred thousand worlds across time and space, their hands intertwined, nothing but sweet honeyed truth on her tongue.

They kept getting married, over and over again, and the wonderment of knowing that they each meant every word of the vows they gave never gave way.

The most important wedding they shared however was one with no officiant, no observers -- just the two of them tying their hands together with a blood red sash, speaking words of commitment in his ancient, dying,  native tongue.

Just as, like, a rambling excerpt of my current soup of thoughts about that fic.

2. also still working on the two other new d/r fics, which have the working titles:

“water is taught by thirst; love by memorial mould” (because I spent an hour re-reading my childhood collection of Dickinson poems. The two parts in this title separated by the semicolon are actually two separate lines of the poem which I connected for this title because I felt that they encapsulated some of thematic elements that I was exploring in the fic. Initially, I wanted to simply call it “water is taught by thirst” as a reference to the Doctor relearning the power of his own telepathy in the face of his loss of it. I ended up adding the second bit as I liked the idea of the relearning of love, since that’s the second bit of the thematic thread for the fic. This fic is, for the curious, the 21 page fic that I wrote yesterday.) This fic is a weird one tracking the evolution of a telepathic bond between the Doctor and Rose, and an evolution of their unspoken feelings. In this verse, there are human telepaths, which the Doctor explain to Rose (”It’s a recessive trait, about as rare as albinism”) The fic swaps between a post-doomsday Doctor struggling with the loss of an intimate connection that he realises he has never properly explained to Rose and the evolution of that intimate telepathic connection between them -- starting with End of the World. For extra pain, Jackie Tyler is still in the prime universe post-doomsday as she was never on board the TARDIS when they went to Canary Wharf; she and the Doctor grieve together, because despite vehement denials otherwise by both parties they care about one another outside of their relationships with Rose. Rose creates a dimension canon and has a VERY long path to walk before a reunion. There is a LOT of angst for both parties.

“O lef liif, what is te?” (literally translated as, oh dear life what is with you?, from the Breton lay Sir Orfeo. dear life in this case is Orfeo’s term of endearment for his beloved wife, which i think is particularly interesting as sir Orfeo is a Breton retelling of the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice. I’ve also just been percolating a lot of Doctor/Rose fics that are thematically connected to Sir Orfeo or the tale of Orpheus and Eurydice in my head. This is, of course, owing to many, many, revolutions of Hadestown, the countless re-reads of Orpheus and Eurydice in D’Aulaires’ Book of Greek Myths in my childhood and my love of Sir Orfeo -- one of the first Middle-English poems I translated in college.) This fic is a sequel of sorts to “Water is taught by thirst; love by memorial mould” It’s the reunion scene. Rose finally, finally find her way back to the prime universe and to the Doctor (but is uh, almost dying). Worse, the Doctor she finds is one who doesn’t know her yet. (she finds eight, and the fic ended up being eight POV)

I guess now that I’m writing this post, I’m getting a little more narrative clarity on this concept. I think there is a fic that is an interlude between “water is taught by thirst; love by memorial mould” and “O lef liif, what is te?” That chronicles (in snippets ofc, as that seems to be all I’m writing these days lmaoooo) Rose’s dimension hopping adventures. “O lef liif, what is te?” has 2 chapters, an eight POV -- which I have written ~14 pages of, and a ten POV chapter, which may actually just be me cutting the post-doomsday ten bits out of the “water is taught by thirst; love by memorial mould” and moving them to “O lef liif, what is te?” -- which should lead all the way up until the reunion. lef liif might, should i be so motivated, have a sequel which is basically The  Runaway Bride and Smith and Jones, but with Rose, and an interlude of Rose and the Doctor getting married because I’m romantic mushy trash.

I haven’t come up with a title yet for this collection/series, but I’m thinking something from Promises, Hadestown. (”Just walk beside me love, any way the wind blows” or “keep on walking come what will”) Doctor/Rose Tropes that are in this fic as of this moment:

• Time Lord!Rose
• Telepathic Bond
• Dimension Hopping Rose

***

Outlining Water:

end of the world (”there’s me” + a TARDIS library scene) [already written]

Unquiet Dead (Tension in the new link when they argue over the Gelth?,”I’m so glad met you”) 

(”I could save the world but lose you”) in Aliens of London/World War III

Dalek, The Doctor reaching out when he first thinks she’s been killed by the dalek, and Rose getting her first look at how important telepathy actually is to the Doctor (”I’d know. In here. Feels like there’s no one”) + post EP convo in the library after Adam is settled in for the night -- the emotional exhaustion of the day has them strengthening their link.

The Long Game, The link is threatened by the Doctor’s insecurities as he experiences jealousy over Rose inviting Adam along. The Doctor is mulling over “what use are emotions if they will not save the woman you love” from Dalek, and is coming to some, uh, new conclusions about why their link feels ... different. (”I only take the best. I’ve got Rose”)

Father’s Day, When the Doctor is temporarily erased from existence by the reapers, Rose experiences the excruciating pain of the link breaking unnaturally. The link is threatened again when the Doctor and Rose argue about the paradox situation. Post-EP the Doctor ends up comforting Rose after a nightmare, and the two inadvertently strengthen the link. The Doctor realises that he’s in love with Rose but promises himself that he will never say anything to her about it.

The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances: The link is threatened again by Jack’s appearance. The Doctor feels the horny energy(tm) in the (“Rose- Rose I’m trying to resonate concrete”) bit and it is ... uhhh intense for him.

Boomtown, Rose unambiguously breaks up with Mickey, the team TARDIS trio has settled into a groove, as Jack has ... correctly read the “hands off the girl” signs.

Bad Wolf/Parting of the Ways, This is a Major Moment. Starts with (”No, but you could ask. Never even occurred to you, did it?” / “I’m just too good”) For the first time since their link was formed the Doctor deliberately hides his intentions to lie to her and trick her into getting into the TARDIS to send her away. He considers severing the bond on his end, but just as he can’t kill the daleks, he can’t sever the bond. Rose POV -- the link tells her that he’s still alive, even though it is the most distant that it has ever been. Jackie can see the signs of the link and she agrees to help Rose open the heart of the TARDIS, bringing the truck. Rose looks into the TARDIS, and the TARDIS looks into her and she dies, essentially regenerating to become a Time Goddess. BAD WOLF. Doctor POV -- (”come here. / I think you need a Doctor”) The Doctor takes the time vortex from rose, kissing her and their link solidifies to a courting bond.

And that's a cap on S1. Don't know at this point whether I should make S2 a part of water or make it a separate fic -- I think that question is just going to have to resolve itself as I write; It really depends on how long each episode's scene is in S1 for water.
 

The Christmas Invasion/Children in Need special, The doctor regenerates, begging Rose to recognize him afterwards using the link. It works, but he’s losing control of himself because the regeneration isn’t going smoothly. Knowing that the TARDIS might crash and leave them in danger somewhere, he selects the saved location autopilot of the Powell Estate and, taking advantage of their new bond and Rose’s curious new status as an additional TARDIS symbiote he essentially makes her the primary symbiote so that the TARDIS isn’t dependent on his health for the time being. The Doctor passes out, so the fic switches to Rose POV. Rose is not really aware of what the Doctor has just done, and doesn’t realize what is happening as she is also having a rough time from dying/regenerating earlier, and feeling the echoes of the Doctor’s death/regeneration along their link. In this verse, because Rose has the advantage of the bond she can’t/doesn’t doubt his identity. The TARDIS lands back at the Powell estate. Rose, Mickey and Jackie take the Doctor’s unconscious body up to the flat. Both Rose and the Doctor are leaking atron -- the Doctor more visibly. Rose experiences her first random mental infodump, which is confusing as hell for her, but definitely helpful.
 

“It was the weirdest thing. I suddenly knew all of these things about the Sycorax, and their customs, and I knew what to say to them to stall for time. It’s gone now though.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” the Doctor said, “Right before I got really sick, I gave you control over the TARDIS so that we wouldn’t both get killed in a crash or something. She probably gave you that information. She can be somewhat meddlesome sometimes.”

“Oh,” Rose said, “Do I need to do something to give you back control over the TARDIS?”

“Yeah. I’ll show you though. Meet you in the library in about five minutes? I know you wanted to put on your jim jams.”

She smiled at him, “’Kay,” she said.

 

They are both SUPER awkward during their first TARDIS library telepathy chat post POTW, but it's still the Doctor and Rose, so they make it work lol. The Doctor has (2) things he neglects to explain to Rose that he knows, but is afraid to tell her about:

1. Rose literally became a goddess -- the goddess of time from ancient Galifreyan mythology. That one is throwing him for a god damn loop, and he isn't ready to explain that one, as he's still digesting this himself. Rose remembers some of what happened at the end of POTW when she returned to save him. The Doctor is too much of an emotional coward to try and tell her anything else about that -- he resolves to just wait and see what Rose remembers and go from there.

2. He kissed her at the end of POTW to save her life, and in doing so made their link into a courting bond. ("Rose, stood before him, a golden goddess, offering again what she had been unknowingly offering him for months. This time, the Doctor gave in, falling, accepting her suit, sealing the promise with a kiss of death, taking that power from her and returning it to the TARDIS.")


Haven't got any plans/lines picked for S2 outside of TCI -- I had some very clear visions in my mind of specific scenes for the TCI re-write in water, but that's about it. Oh, and as some people who have known me and my Doctor Who opinions for YEARS know, there is a certain S2 episode that I despise. Since this is my fic, I'm not even going to bother fixing GITF, I've already made the executive decision to basically delete the entire episode from the water 'verse. GITF is already mondo OOC in canon, but I think it would be even more OOC for the Doctor and Rose in water, because they are MUCH closer and more open with one another. The Doctor is still, uh... emotionally stunted, and terrible with words that actually mean something, but their telepathic link -- now bond in S2, really promotes trust and understanding and closeness between them.

Additionally, School Reunion, is going to look mightily different in the water verse' because Rose already has a working knowledge of a lot of the Doctor's friends, including Sarah Jane. Mickey and Rose have been clearly broken up since Boomtown, so they have a lot less tension because Rose hasn't been stringing Mickey on in water.

As S2 progresses, Rose will have more moments of random, useful infodump downloads -- none as big and noticeable as the one she has in TCI, but still ... off.

Whew! This got a lot longer and more detailed than I thought it was going to be when I set out to write this post! Anyways, that's me, writing fic seriously with outlines and plans and research for the first time in aaaaages. This is also WAY more ambitious than any other project I've ever attempted so we'll have to wait and see how this goes haha. I think I want to get myself to write at least a few pages every week -- this is going to be slooooooooow going, and I'm going to actually wait until I have a draft 1 complete before I post anything to AO3/ff.net/whofic. Gonna be a doozy folks! Until next time!